the second it gets cold
i pop knives into my mouth
and chew
warmth floods me
along with the pain

i am willing to sacrifice

i wake up 
to find myself 
masticating broken glass
“Just a rite of passage”
my mother assures me
crouching on my dresser
her wings tightly curled around her

i am willing to sacrifice
for as long as it will take

tonight i woke up 
with a demon perched on my chest
his scaly hands holding pliers
jammed between my jaws
i want to scream at him
JUST PULL ALREADY
instead he yanks slightly
back and forth
back and forth
then pushes
and the pain spikes into my brain
blossoms like a sea urchin
and i pass out.

willing.

when sunlight filters onto my face
the demon is gone
only a faint throbbing where he was
i imagine i chased him off 
with a bag of seeds
but i know he’ll be back tonight.

sacrifice.

i take your knife and pliers
steal them away from the tool box
and split my face down the middle
opening it like an oyster.
i root around inside for pearls
come up empty handed.

i sit, 
naked and shivering.

I’ve made my sacrifice.

where is the 
wisdom
promised me? 

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